The Dystopian TV SATIRE Continues

Book 2: ‘What’s your problem?’ Trilogy

Tony's Letter from Tony's Cross by Maxwell Winshire

1) a ferrari

Reezon: give my dad a lift

What’s inside

Tony O’Brian vs Odin Folie
More secrets of the Freakmasons
More Live Sex on the Porn Stage

Psychiatric Assessment


Full Name: Anthony O’Brien
Date of Birth/Time: 2.12.2064 / 3.27pm
Star sign: Sagittarius
Appearance and behaviour: Initially extremely uncooperative, monosyllabic replies. Verbally aggressive. Good eye contact although “stared on occasions.” Difficult to establish a
rapport. Sportily dressed.
Affect: Labile—unstable—liable to undergone change. Irritable affect.
Mood: Subjectively he described being quite angry. Objectively rather difficult to assess due to his difficulty in establishing a rapport.
Speech: Speech pressured with raised volume and tone, sporadic in flow but no flight of ideas.
Thought: Denied paranoid ideation, but extremely violent reaction to discussion of sexuality, provoking vague and unsupported homicidal thoughts towards me, describing me as a ‘useless quack’. Denied ideas of self-harm. In spite of his reluctance to respond at times, there was no evidence of thought broadcasting, thought insertion or thought withdrawal thus exhibiting no formal thought disorder.
Perception: Very antagonistic but patient denies having any auditory or visual hallucinations.
Slightly grandiose way of thinking for an eighteen-year-old, ‘I can take care of it myself, don’t worry’ and ‘I’ll sort it.’ Extremely strong feelings of persecution, irritable and hostile. No psychotic features, denied perceptual abnormalities.
Sleep/Appetite: Unforthcoming.
Drug and Alcohol History: Unforthcoming, though evidenced below.
Physical examination: Refused fully naked examination but stripped to boxer shorts. Self-made tattoo of heart with arrow on left bicep. Pupils dilated but reactive to light. Urine drug screen positive for cocaine metabolites, several injection sites in both arms, new and old and on legs. Pulse 60 per minute regular, BP 100/70. Hepatitis B and C status negative.
Cognitive function: Alert and arousable. There was no planning consciousness and he appeared fully orientated but this was not set formally.
Insight: Didn’t feel he was suffering from any kind of mental condition and irritated by the suggestion, pacing up and down and wanted to ‘get out now’ unwilling to accept the idea that the room he wanted to leave might be in his head.



Tony is eighteen, with an attitude problem; he doesn’t like yours.

Tony likes drugs, who doesn’t. Listens to gangster rap, likewise. Everyone’s on the make; dog eat dog; survival of the fittest; act before you’re acted upon and ask questions later. There’s only one person who counts: Tony. And if you don’t like that, you’ve got a problem. If he wins the TV show, he wants a Ferrari, ‘to give my dad a lift’ and an ‘AM/FMd’; A Mobile/ For My Dad, ‘so my dad can call me whenever he wants’.

Odin is a retarded convicted paedophile. He is very excited about being Tony’s counsellor because he is such a ‘beautiful sexy boy’. If he wins, he wants some pills to take Tony on a ‘special’ date.

But who will win? And is the prize worth the effort for one, and the forfeit for the other?

"Funny, Wild and Shocking"

Editorial Review

"Horrific ending. You can't unsee what you don't see here."

Edward Leader


"Darkly humorous and not for the faint-hearted"

Olivia Howard

About the author.

Maxwell Winshire and dog
Max is the author of the ‘What’s your problem?’ Trilogy, published by Seedwood Publishing in 2022.

Max is happiest when he is out with his bitch, Sandy, his dog–not his girlfriend, or boyfriend! Max is non-binary, ie. bisexual, but he doesn’t wave a flag, he says, “I just like everyone!” He used to be a schoolteacher before he started writing full-time. His favourite color is check! His favourite jeans are old-skool Levi 501s. His favourite trainers are Converse All-stars. His favourite new band is Blossom from Stockport, UK. His favourite writers are Charles Bukowski, J.D. Salinger, George Orwell, Ken Kesey, Tom Wolfe, Ray Bradbury, Jack Kerouac, Martin Amis, Julian Barnes, Stephen King.

“Language should be as fluid as sexuality, you should experiment with it, create new words, new punctuation. At least that’s my excuse!”

Max describes himself as spiritual rather than religious, doesn’t smoke, drink or do any drugs, and meditates every day. Namaste.

Max Winshire x
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